Thursday, October 12, 2006
Dumb Comment
I was at work today, and a couple coworkers were talking about buying car parts, and one of them was saying how the guy he bought from sent him the wrong year parts, so he was going to call him back and "Jew with him". I didn't hear what he said for a split second, but then I realized it, and just as I realized what he'd said, he realized what he'd said. He immediately started apologizing, but really - how accepting of that term should I be? He was raised in the sticks, and I have used the word "jip" me out of something - which I hear comes from "gypsy", but for one, I think it's more commonly used, and two, I've never actually met a gypsy. How should I have reacted? The more I think about it, the more aggrivated I am that the term is even in existance. What are your thoughts?
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7 comments:
What he said was completely inappropriate and ignorant...regardless of where he is from.
However, I find it disconcerting that you are trying to defend your use of a derogatory slur. Just b/c the word "jip" is more commonly used or because you have never met a Gypsy does NOT make it okay.
I for one think that you need to let it go. You were not harmed by the statement, nor this thought process.
You mention that this person started apologizing right away, obviously he felt bad about what he said. IF you can't take him at his word what kind of person are you? Jesus was a Jew and he was forgiving. If you can't forgive and let it go then you are not a good Jew in this Jew's eyes.
We (as the Jewish people) have to leap into the 21st century. So what, he used the term Jew in relation to the word barter or negotiate, it's not like he tatoo'd your arm and put you into a camp.
Get over yourself.
alright people, my question wasn't asking for an attack.
My comment was that I was disappointed that the word is in existance. I didn't
a) say that I was upset with him at all. You need not forgive someone who you were never angry with to begin with.
b) intend to sound that using the word "jip" is any better. Just saying that it happens to be more commonly used.
but geez, lay off the harsh comments. It was something open for discussion, no need to attack.
I tried to comment yesterday but my comment apparently didn't post.
I actually had no idea what the root of the term jip (as I have always spelled it and now know is incorrect) was or where it came from. I asked my father and even though he spelled it gyp, he had no idea where it had come from. I think that makes a huge difference in the terms.
For me and for most people, I assume, there is no image in my mind of a Gypsy stealing or swindling when I use the word gyp. The word is in such common usage that it seems to function independently of any knowledge of the Gypsy people. It is actually in the dictionary as a verb. Knowing all this, however, I will be a lot less likely to use that phrase from now on.
I can not imagine that is the case when someone uses the phrase "Jew with him." There is no doubt in my mind that the person using that phrase is propagating their negative stereotype of Jewish people. Jew is not a verb; it is a noun, a person.
To berate someone on their blog and not even have the courage to sign your comment is cowardly. If you are so sure you are right, stand by your statements.
I am an Anglo-Saxon white male so I can't comment with any credibility on whether or not a person should let a racist slight against them go, but I am a Marine officer and a leader. I would never let a racist comment by someone in my command go unaddressed. If I laugh, agree, or just say nothing, the person sees that and thinks to himself "Hey, the Lieutenant is ok with this behavior so it must be ok." The culture spreads and worsens the longer you leave it unchecked. I'm not saying that I'm going to send them to the brig for talking about "Jewing with someone", but I'm damn sure going to let him and everyone who heard him say it that his comment was unacceptable.
Now working in an engineering firm is not the Marine Corps and Bela is not in command, but she deserves to feel respected and comfortable at work. I don't think she needs to go tell the boss, but definitely saying something to this person is appropriate. He probably won't change, but if you say nothing he definitely won't change.
Finally, his profuse apologies were not because he was sorry about what he said, they were because he was sorry he got caught. If Bela had not been there he would have still said it and not thought twice about it. Is it right to be a racist as long as you just express it around your own kind?
Hey there Mr. Officer and Gentlemen is my favorite movie, don't be so high and mighty. If you are in the Corp, you certainly hear things based on ethnicity, race, sex, religion and sexual preferences and I would highly doubt that you step up and say something everytime it happens. Can you honestly say that you would contradict your DI infront of the platoon or company? I doubt it.
also, how do you have any idea as to the nature of this persons apology? How do you know if he was sincere? Do you know the offender? Is this a common occurance with this person?
There are too many variables happening here for ANYONE to make a judgement. None of us except Bela were there and cannot say how this jackass felt.
ZM
Zack,
You certainly don't understand the Corps at all. First of all, I'm an officer, so I don't answer to Drill Instructors, who are sergeants and staff sergeants. They answer to me.
Second of all, it is my duty as an officer to enforce the Corps' policies against sexual harassment, racism, and discrimination. I do and have said something every time I have encountered a situation when someone junior to me said something inappropriate. There are weak willed officers in all the branches who might let that kind of thing go but I am not one of them. I take my oath seriously.
The wonderful thing about the Corps is that I honestly don't encounter those kinds of situations very often because the culture of the Corps is so set against that kind of attitude. We are brothers in arms from all walks of life and we respect each other. There is always an exception and I'm sure some of that crap goes on when I'm not there, but every Marine I work with knows I don't tolerate it.
If I was confronted with a situation in which a senior officer said something unacceptable then no, I would not confront him in front of everyone. That would be insubordinate. I would, however, at a later time speak with him and respectfully tell him my concerns.
My conjecture about the nature of his apology is just that, conjecture. Of course I was not in his head at the time. But having grown up in the south and having met dozens of people like him I can make a pretty educated guess.
I like how you attack me for my judgement and then call the man a jackass at the end. Bit of a double standard?
Bela, you are (or at least were) upset with him, and not simply at the existence of the word. The only reason words come into existence is because people use them. The only way to take a word out of use is to educate people as to why they should not use it, and that means not allowing them to get away with a simple apology, but actually explaining to them the reason you feel the way you feel about the term.
To talk about "jewing someone" does propagate a hateful stereotype. It is never a positive thing to "jew someone", so the use of the word clearly attaches a negative stigma to Jews in general.
In response to Ed Ames, I think you, sir, need to go get a f***ing clue about the world. Do you really think it is harmless for her to let that go? How do you think the Holocaust came about? How do you think the Arabs in the Middle East create such a hate for the Jews amongst themselves? It is entirely through propagation, little by little, of negative imagery and stereotypes against the Jews. If you think for a second that just because we're in "America" that something like the Holocaust can't possibly happen to us again, you are so, so wrong. The Jews have always been, and will continue to be persecuted in cycles. Persecution followed by freedom, followed by persecution again. We're now living in freedom, and it's only a matter of time before we are widely persecuted again. Take a look at the blatant antisemitism going on in France now. Take a look at the Arabs in the Middle East. They are all trying to propagate negative images of the Jews around the world, and the only way to do that is little by little. By introducing and using words like the verb "jew".
And by the way, I agree with Josh that that apology was only because he was caught. It's like the kid caught stealing cookies. He doesn't feel sorry for it. He only feels sorry when he's caught and is about to receive a stern scolding.
Why don't YOU leap into the twenty-first century and open your eyes to what is going on around the world. If you had even the slightest clue, you would realize that what you've said is utter bullsh*t, and you would be out there your own damn self giving a talking to that guy. 'Nuff said.
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